I attended Toastmasters for awhile with Douglas. During the first few weeks of attending, they ask you to present a speech about yourself so that others in the group can get to know you better. Below is the speech I presented.
Late 1986, Early 1987
It’s 1986. The president is Ronald Reagan. Out of Africa just won the Oscar for Best Picture. We are watching Oprah Winfrey in her first year on national television and most kids are listening to “Walk Like and Egyptian” by the Bangles.
Mr. Toastmaster, Fellow Toastmasters and Honored Guests.
Forty six years is too long to condense into 4-6 minutes. So I am just going to tell you about the end of 1986 and the beginning of 1987. These short few months will tell you plenty about who I am and some of my deeply imbedded beliefs and characteristics.
In August of 1986 I am 22 and just returning from an 18 month mission that I served in Argentina for my church. I have no job, no car, and a leg in a cast. I move in with my older sister Torrance California. I register for a typing class at the local college that is close enough to walk to…well, hobble for me at the time, and I begin to make my life plans.
I am talking to my brother-in-law Roger, the one who I live with, and I am laying out my exit strategy from his home. I have three bullet points. I need a car, a job and then a pension. He tells me straight up that I better be out of his house WAY before I start collecting a pension! What Roger doesn’t know is that I am still translating from Spanish in my head back into English and the translation of the word “pension” isn’t “pension”, but rather apartment. After I clear that up, Roger offers to loan me the money for a car in anticipation of a job, thereby helping me get that apartment.
While my leg is healing and my typing is improving, I purchase a used Camero with a loan from Roger. Bullet point one…CHECK. Now for the job.
The first week out of my cast, I hit the classifieds. The best two days to look for a job were Wednesday and Sunday. This happened to be a Wednesday. I made several calls and set up my appointments. By the end of Friday, I had gone on a total of eight interviews.
Out of the eight, I knew exactly the job I wanted, but I also knew that the President of Bey Medical Systems did not believe I had the qualifications or experience he was looking for. But I knew I did and that’s all that mattered.
Here was my plan. I would get up really early Monday morning, get all dressed up for work and drive down to the Bey Medical offices in my shiny used Camero, and present myself to the president. He had mentioned during the interview that he always came in before the rest of the employees, so I knew I would have him alone.
Upon arrival, I walked into the almost deserted building and knocked on his office door. He looked surprised, but let me in. I asked if he remembered me from the interview and he assured me that he did. I then went into my speech. It went something like this…
I know you don’t think I am qualified to work here, but I am here to convince you otherwise. I also know you do not have anyone in the position as yet. I propose that I stay here and work for the entire week, while you still do your interviewing, and at the end of the week, if I was worth anything, you can pay me. But if I haven’t proven that I can do this job, you can send me packing without a paycheck.”
His reply was “That’s a no brainer. Your desk is over there. I will have my secretary fill you in on what needs to be done.” So I thanked him and took a seat at my new desk. By Thursday, I had a key to the building and he paid me for the entire first week of employment. Bullet point number two…CHECK.
I was ready to tackle the apartment. My best friend Sheila and I decided to move out together and share expenses. I just needed a couple months to save money for the first and last months rent.
During this time, I was very active in my church’s social group. There were picnics and dances all up and down Southern California for a young Mormon single adult to attend.
It was Saturday December 13th and by a twist of fate Mark called me. He was a friend of Sheila’s and for some reason he convinced me to come to the Chatsworth dance instead of the one in Newport Beach that I was planning on. I usually went to all the dances with Sheila, but there again, this night was different. Sheila couldn’t come and I didn’t want to drive alone, so I called Barbie. We drove up together in my new used Camero. Remember bullet point number one?
We met Mark and one of his friends at the dance. But I was leaving myself open to dance with anyone else who might ask. Barbie and I were totally out of our area and didn’t recognize a soul. But what the heck, I knew how to make the best of it.
After a couple fast songs where I had danced with my usual energy, a slow song come on and I decided to take the opportunity to kick off my shoes. So I wandered up to the stage, hopped up backwards and proceeded to remove my shoes. This guy leaning up against the stage a few feet away made the comment “That’s the slowest I’ve seen you move all night.” I looked over and smiled, and he came and introduced himself as Douglas. We chatted during the slow song and then he asked me to dance the next one. We danced together the rest of the night.
Before driving away, I did something unusual for me… I wrote my phone number inside a match book. I had never given a guy my phone number without him asking. This took more courage than showing up for a job where I hadn’t been hired.
The next night, Douglas used the number. Finally, at the end of two hours, he invited me to see a movie with him. I accepted of course. But we lived so far away the question of where to meet came up. That is when I said if he came to Torrance, I would make it “worth the drive”. He agreed to pick me up at my sisters.
Our first date was a Tuesday night. We saw the movie “Star Trek - Voyage Home”. Our next date was Thursday night, where I tried to make Rand jealous by showing up at a Christmas party with another guy. Rand and I had never dated, but I wanted to. This was going to be the night he saw what he was missing. So I arranged a ride for myself to the party, knowing I would have at least two guys who would take me home. But Rand never showed up. So Doug won by default.
That year I had vacation between Christmas and New Years and Doug worked construction, which was slow that week, and we ended up spending every day together.
Part of the time we spent was Doug helping me move out of my sisters and into my own apartment. Bullet point number three…CHECK. I had a car, a job, my own apartment and now a boyfriend… not on the list, but also not unwelcome.
Then came New Years Eve and another church social. Doug and I decided to attend. You’ll never believe who was there…Rand. Doug was sitting on the edge of the stage and I was leaning up against him when Rand approached. While looking right at Doug, the first thing out of Rand’s mouth was, “So, you must be number five.” Totally natural, Doug said “No, I’m Doug.” Rand just gave him a wry smile and walked away.
I was fuming! The number five comes from the fact that I had been asked, up to this point in my life, four times to be married. Rand was making a snide remark about Doug being the fifth man to ask me to marry him, and inferring that he would probably get the fifth rejection as had the previous four.
A few minutes later, I went looking for Rand and a chance to speak my mind. I found him alone and pushed him up against the wall. I told him in no uncertain terms that Doug was NOT number five, and then I made another comment that really shocked even me. I said, “But if he is, there won’t be a number six!”
Doug and I were engaged January 2nd 1987. After I agreed to marry Doug, he asked me this, “Oh by the way, what’s your last name?” You see, I had only put my first name in the matchbook and he never bothered to ask about my last.
Like most brides, I wanted to inscribe the perfect saying inside Doug’s wedding band, but it had to fit my personality. The old stand-bys of “Eternally Yours” or “Friends Forever” just wouldn’t cut it. So instead, I inscribed inside his wedding band the words “Worth the Drive”. Doug and I will celebrate our 23rd wedding anniversary this March 26th.
Let’s recap. From August through March, I returned from Argentina, went to college, had my cast removed, took out a loan and bought a car, bullied my way into employment, got a boyfriend, moved out with a girlfriend with the help of that boyfriend, got engaged, got married and moved in with now husband, who by the way had to help move the same furniture twice!
So, what did you learn about me? Hopefully you picked up on that fact that I am a woman of faith. I am also fiercely independent. I usually know what I want and I look for a ways to get it. I am not an introvert. I like Star Trek or I never would have agreed to a second date with Doug. I am sentimental, but not sickening sweet. I have an odd sense of humor. And now I am honored to be part of Toastmasters where I can learn to be even more effective in all that I endeavor to become.
Mr. Toastmaster, Fellow Toastmasters and Honored Guests. Thank You.
Mr. Toastmaster, Fellow Toastmasters and Honored Guests.
Forty six years is too long to condense into 4-6 minutes. So I am just going to tell you about the end of 1986 and the beginning of 1987. These short few months will tell you plenty about who I am and some of my deeply imbedded beliefs and characteristics.
In August of 1986 I am 22 and just returning from an 18 month mission that I served in Argentina for my church. I have no job, no car, and a leg in a cast. I move in with my older sister Torrance California. I register for a typing class at the local college that is close enough to walk to…well, hobble for me at the time, and I begin to make my life plans.
I am talking to my brother-in-law Roger, the one who I live with, and I am laying out my exit strategy from his home. I have three bullet points. I need a car, a job and then a pension. He tells me straight up that I better be out of his house WAY before I start collecting a pension! What Roger doesn’t know is that I am still translating from Spanish in my head back into English and the translation of the word “pension” isn’t “pension”, but rather apartment. After I clear that up, Roger offers to loan me the money for a car in anticipation of a job, thereby helping me get that apartment.
While my leg is healing and my typing is improving, I purchase a used Camero with a loan from Roger. Bullet point one…CHECK. Now for the job.
The first week out of my cast, I hit the classifieds. The best two days to look for a job were Wednesday and Sunday. This happened to be a Wednesday. I made several calls and set up my appointments. By the end of Friday, I had gone on a total of eight interviews.
Out of the eight, I knew exactly the job I wanted, but I also knew that the President of Bey Medical Systems did not believe I had the qualifications or experience he was looking for. But I knew I did and that’s all that mattered.
Here was my plan. I would get up really early Monday morning, get all dressed up for work and drive down to the Bey Medical offices in my shiny used Camero, and present myself to the president. He had mentioned during the interview that he always came in before the rest of the employees, so I knew I would have him alone.
Upon arrival, I walked into the almost deserted building and knocked on his office door. He looked surprised, but let me in. I asked if he remembered me from the interview and he assured me that he did. I then went into my speech. It went something like this…
I know you don’t think I am qualified to work here, but I am here to convince you otherwise. I also know you do not have anyone in the position as yet. I propose that I stay here and work for the entire week, while you still do your interviewing, and at the end of the week, if I was worth anything, you can pay me. But if I haven’t proven that I can do this job, you can send me packing without a paycheck.”
His reply was “That’s a no brainer. Your desk is over there. I will have my secretary fill you in on what needs to be done.” So I thanked him and took a seat at my new desk. By Thursday, I had a key to the building and he paid me for the entire first week of employment. Bullet point number two…CHECK.
I was ready to tackle the apartment. My best friend Sheila and I decided to move out together and share expenses. I just needed a couple months to save money for the first and last months rent.
During this time, I was very active in my church’s social group. There were picnics and dances all up and down Southern California for a young Mormon single adult to attend.
It was Saturday December 13th and by a twist of fate Mark called me. He was a friend of Sheila’s and for some reason he convinced me to come to the Chatsworth dance instead of the one in Newport Beach that I was planning on. I usually went to all the dances with Sheila, but there again, this night was different. Sheila couldn’t come and I didn’t want to drive alone, so I called Barbie. We drove up together in my new used Camero. Remember bullet point number one?
We met Mark and one of his friends at the dance. But I was leaving myself open to dance with anyone else who might ask. Barbie and I were totally out of our area and didn’t recognize a soul. But what the heck, I knew how to make the best of it.
After a couple fast songs where I had danced with my usual energy, a slow song come on and I decided to take the opportunity to kick off my shoes. So I wandered up to the stage, hopped up backwards and proceeded to remove my shoes. This guy leaning up against the stage a few feet away made the comment “That’s the slowest I’ve seen you move all night.” I looked over and smiled, and he came and introduced himself as Douglas. We chatted during the slow song and then he asked me to dance the next one. We danced together the rest of the night.
Before driving away, I did something unusual for me… I wrote my phone number inside a match book. I had never given a guy my phone number without him asking. This took more courage than showing up for a job where I hadn’t been hired.
The next night, Douglas used the number. Finally, at the end of two hours, he invited me to see a movie with him. I accepted of course. But we lived so far away the question of where to meet came up. That is when I said if he came to Torrance, I would make it “worth the drive”. He agreed to pick me up at my sisters.
Our first date was a Tuesday night. We saw the movie “Star Trek - Voyage Home”. Our next date was Thursday night, where I tried to make Rand jealous by showing up at a Christmas party with another guy. Rand and I had never dated, but I wanted to. This was going to be the night he saw what he was missing. So I arranged a ride for myself to the party, knowing I would have at least two guys who would take me home. But Rand never showed up. So Doug won by default.
That year I had vacation between Christmas and New Years and Doug worked construction, which was slow that week, and we ended up spending every day together.
Part of the time we spent was Doug helping me move out of my sisters and into my own apartment. Bullet point number three…CHECK. I had a car, a job, my own apartment and now a boyfriend… not on the list, but also not unwelcome.
Then came New Years Eve and another church social. Doug and I decided to attend. You’ll never believe who was there…Rand. Doug was sitting on the edge of the stage and I was leaning up against him when Rand approached. While looking right at Doug, the first thing out of Rand’s mouth was, “So, you must be number five.” Totally natural, Doug said “No, I’m Doug.” Rand just gave him a wry smile and walked away.
I was fuming! The number five comes from the fact that I had been asked, up to this point in my life, four times to be married. Rand was making a snide remark about Doug being the fifth man to ask me to marry him, and inferring that he would probably get the fifth rejection as had the previous four.
A few minutes later, I went looking for Rand and a chance to speak my mind. I found him alone and pushed him up against the wall. I told him in no uncertain terms that Doug was NOT number five, and then I made another comment that really shocked even me. I said, “But if he is, there won’t be a number six!”
Doug and I were engaged January 2nd 1987. After I agreed to marry Doug, he asked me this, “Oh by the way, what’s your last name?” You see, I had only put my first name in the matchbook and he never bothered to ask about my last.
Like most brides, I wanted to inscribe the perfect saying inside Doug’s wedding band, but it had to fit my personality. The old stand-bys of “Eternally Yours” or “Friends Forever” just wouldn’t cut it. So instead, I inscribed inside his wedding band the words “Worth the Drive”. Doug and I will celebrate our 23rd wedding anniversary this March 26th.
Let’s recap. From August through March, I returned from Argentina, went to college, had my cast removed, took out a loan and bought a car, bullied my way into employment, got a boyfriend, moved out with a girlfriend with the help of that boyfriend, got engaged, got married and moved in with now husband, who by the way had to help move the same furniture twice!
So, what did you learn about me? Hopefully you picked up on that fact that I am a woman of faith. I am also fiercely independent. I usually know what I want and I look for a ways to get it. I am not an introvert. I like Star Trek or I never would have agreed to a second date with Doug. I am sentimental, but not sickening sweet. I have an odd sense of humor. And now I am honored to be part of Toastmasters where I can learn to be even more effective in all that I endeavor to become.
Mr. Toastmaster, Fellow Toastmasters and Honored Guests. Thank You.